Every night has its dawn
by Sexysiren1981
Summary: AU Smallville. Lana can't forget her past, because she knows that it's her future too. *Gift fic For Jessica L Nite*


Authors note, unbeta'd. For Jessica, my muse. This is how Lex and Lana''s story should have ended.

I might edit this a little more at a later date.

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She was drawn to him, even though she thought she had put all of this behind her. She had thought that she had finally laid her demons to rest. But fate, or whatever perverse deity actually existed up there, had deemed it nessesary to remind her of all she'd lost, all that could have been.

She had denied her own true nature for too long, pretended to be what she wasn't, she'd done what others expected of her.

What Clark had expected of her.

She had lied to herself for too long, and in so doing had altered her destiny.

It had always been him.

He was her true match, her other half and yet she had betrayed him just as surely as he had betrayed her.

All the anger he had made her feel was still there, festering like a wound filled with gangrene.

Unresolved feelings undoubtedly got stronger with the years, doubling their potency.

Yes, Lana found herself drawn toward Lex, like a moth drawn to a flame.

She followed his career, his disappearance and his resurrection with a fanatical edge which she hid from all who knew her. She even lied to herself about the reasons behind stalking her ex-husband.

But the thing about lying to yourself was that you could only do it for so long before the truth became glaringly obvious.

Lana knew that Lex was back in Metropolis now, the news had been filled with the miracle of his return.

The years she'd spent patrolling the streets, ridding them of crime had given her none of the satisfaction she had hoped they would. She felt curiously empty, barren, unfulfilled.

She had done the noble thing, the good thing, and saved the city by absorbing all of that kryptonite.

Although it hadn't been a sacrifice at all.

The secret she'd hidden from Clark, indeed from everyone, was that it had not been the hardest thing to bare.

Far from it, she had relished her freedom.

The choice had been taken out of her hands completely.

For once she had been unable to be with Clark, she'd been set free from her self imposed prison.

Lex had set her free.

His face had haunted her dreams for all these years.

That hated face, that beloved face - had driven her almost crazy.

It had been his final revenge on Clark and her, poetic justice as it were, separating her from Clark for all eternity.

"She will never be yours now." His gaze had told them.

Lana hated that she couldn't forget him, instead she often recalled things she'd much rather forget.

Deeply intimate moments between them in the very beginning when she had almost followed her heart and become Lex's partner in crime. She had blackmailed Dr Groll, securing Lex's hold on the black box and giving Lionel a dose of his own medicine.

Protecting Lex had felt good, right even, but being bad had felt even better.

When she had told Lex about her pregnancy and gotten him back from that other frequency, she had known deep down inside that there was a 33.1 and that Lex was behind it all.

She had known in that moment that she was just like Lex.

She had agreed with his reasoning and even would have helped him, if he had just been honest with her.

But Lex was nothing if not cautious and he had denied the very existence of 33.1 and then asked her to marry him, diverting her attention rather successfully.

She had started finding out Clark's secret and slowly but surely had convinced herself that he was what she wanted, what she needed, what everyone had always expected her to have.

The hero, the ultimate good guy, a man her own parents would have chose for her, had they been alive.

Would they have approved of her addiction to a man far older than her? A man who was growing more evil every day? A man whom she was addicted to in the most primal of ways?

She seriously doubted that they would have understood or approved of any of it.

So she had fought her connection with Lex, turning herself against him until she hated the very sight of him and she could no longer bare his touch.

And then she had lost her baby.

The one thing holding her and Lex together.

It had never existed, she was told.

It had all been a lie.

Every glance, the happiness they had felt, the plans they had made, all of it was fake.

Lana couldn't believe it at first, her gut told her that the man she had come to know would not have faked a child to keep her. The man who held her gaze with such intensity when they fucked, would not have lied about the absolute joy he had felt when she had confessed her pregnancy to him.

But Lana had ignored her instincts and left Lex, faking her own death by placing a clone Lex had made of her in her Jeep before blowing it to Kingdom come.

She had hidden from him in Shanghai, knowing full well that he would find her.

He was Lex, after all, and she knew he would not stop looking for her after he had figured out what she had done.

She had waited for him, grim determination her guiding force.

Her own men had told her that he had traced her to that very apartment. She had operatives everywhere, because she knew knowledge was power.

Lex had taught her well.

She was strangely calm as she brushed her hair and waited for him to come to her.

The pistol hidden under a towel on her dresser served as a reminder of whom this man had become to her, who she had made him into.

The enemy.

Ultimately the sight of his face had been her undoing.

His calm determination and touch had disarmed her and she had found herself crying because there was no going back to the Lex and Lana they had been.

"Do it Lana, the world will be a better place." He had said as she pressed the gun to his chest.

Her hands had shook, her need for revenge disappeared with the though of never seeing him again.

No, she couldn't kill him.

She didn't analyse why, she didn't want to know the answer.

Lex set her free then, giving her all she had convinced herself that she wanted.

Then Oliver Queen had killed him.

Lex was gone and her heart imploded in her chest.

She hid it well, throwing herself into her new life, free from Clark, free from Lex...

She fought the emptiness everyday, telling herself that she missed Clark.

But nothing could be further from the truth.

Lex was alive and well and living in Metropolis now, in their apartment.

Lana hated the memories which would surface each time she thought of its quiet elegance.

She had spent a lot of time there with Lex in the beginning of their relationship, and all of that time had been spent in bed.

She remembered all too clearly all the things that Lex had taught her.

His sensual expertise had been her tutor in all things sex and love.

She couldn't recall a time when Lex had not been her secret obsession.

From the first time she had seen him watching her, she had been fascinated and intrigued.

With him she became someone else, the naive school girl vaished and in her place was a self confident woman who liked to share banter with Lex Luthor.

With him she was the girl who laughed and joked with a billionaire playboy. She was the girl who Lex Luthor considered a friend. She was the girl who went to Paris, first class.

He didn't see her as a child to pity and he had always treated her with respect.

Lex had tried to act as though he wanted her to be with Clark, but Lana now knew differently. He had always coveted her from afar and waited until the time was right to make his own move on her.

Her instincts had told her from the very first day that Lex wanted her in a way he really shouldn't.

Lex had always treated her as an equal, never doubting her ability to win her own battles and fight for her own freedom.

And in the end he had granted her freedom for all eternity.

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She found herself drawn to their place, one cold dark night after she had been on patrol for sixteen hours straight. She was bone weary and needed to rest. Her mind switched off and she wandered deep in thought until she had glanced up and seen where she was.

Why had she come here?

Had she finally lost her mind?

She stared up at the penthouse, a thousanf memories flooding her mind before she turned away, her stomach in knots. She went to the park which ran along side their old apartment building. It was unlit but Lana didn't fear for herself, she was well versed in self defence and her suit was foolproof.

Her emotions were a mess as she walked through trees towards a fountain. It's gargoyles grinned at her as if they revelled in her pain and uncertainty.

Lana stopped right beside the rushing water and gazed into its glittering depths, watching the moons reflection dance on the shattered surface as the water cascaded down into a pool below.

A dark figure moved slowly towards her, parting from the shadows directly behind her.

Somehow, she wasn't surprised to see him here.

Deep down inside, it was what she'd hoped for.

Lana lifted her head to look at the one person she hoped she'd never see again and yet longed to see more than anyone else.

He stood there in all his Luthor splendour, dark long coat fluttering in the soft breeze, his gaze intense.

"Did you follow me?" No hello, no pretences, just resignation tinged her voice.

He moved closer, his scent surrounding her, expensive aftershave making her stomach leap.

"I saw you." He stated, voice smooth and deeply melodious.

A deep ache instantly disappeared at the sound of his voice. It was a pain she had barely acknowledged, but one which was always with her.

His voice soothed her in unimaginable ways, in ways it really shouldn't.

Lana nodded, her gaze falling before his probing eyes - it was too much, his gaze and that sardonic smirk did things to her she didn't want to think about.

"Why did you come?" Lex asked, his hands finding their way into his pockets in habit she remembered well.

Why had she come? She didn't know.

"I don't know." She replied honestly. "I wasn't thinking, just walking and then I was here."

Lex looked away, studying the night sky with undue concentration. "How long have you wanted to come here?" He asked, gaze flashing back to her face to watch her reaction to his words.

Lana felt tired suddenly, she had lied to herself for so long.

"For a long time." She admitted, ashamed.

"So you came here, even though you wouldn't have come at all if you had thought it through." He sounded amused. "Always trying to hide from the truth, stop lying to yourself."

Lana glared at him, her hands clasped tightly together in her lap. "I don't lie to myself..."

Lex chuckled, the soft sound twisting her gut. "You're doing it right now. I thought that maybe you were willing to be honest, when I saw you down there. But you're still doing it, Lana."

Lana's hands clenched to fists. "That's rich coming from you Lex! Honest? Really? When have you ever been honest?"

He shifted his weight slightly, his coat flapping in the wind like a living being. "I've always been honest with you."

She scoffed at that false hood and stood up, her entire body tense and ready for a fight. "Liar!" She spat at him, standing her ground even though she wanted to run.

"I've never lied to you." Lex said again, firmly. "You believed what you wished so that you had a reason to hate me."

"Our baby...it was a LIE!" She hissed, annoying tears filling her eyes and blurring her vision.

Lex took one step towards her, until the light from across the street hit his face and then he spoke, sincerity in every word. "I was as surprised by that revelation as you were. Our baby, my child was real to me, I swear it. If you weren't really pregnant then it wasn't my plot or my lie."

Lana shook her head, the tears spilling out of her eyes and down her cheeks. This man made her feel too much, so much, it was overwhelming.

She believed him, God help her. Her instincts told her that he wasn't lying to her now, and she had learnt to trust her gut over the last few years, it had been all that had kept her alive at times.

But then, what were her options? Had she truly hated him for something he hadn't done?

"Lana..." Lex spoke softly, reaching for her for the first time.

She stepped back before his hand could touch her, ignoring the look of pain which crossed his face.

He allowed his emotions to be laid bare before her, she knew that it cost him dearly.

"I believe you..." she whispered, her tone subdued, her head drooping slightly.

Lex's gaze softened as he heard those long waited words and noticed her tiny submission, his heart soared.

"I have a theory...would you like to hear it?" He asked, shoving his hand back into his pocket.

"Not now." Lana said, her voice broken.

A moment passed, the wind picked up and tossed Lana's long ponytail over her shoulder.

"I...I hated you...for that...for something you didn't do...I don't know what to say..." she said, hesitantly, her wounded gaze finally lifting to his.

Lex moved a little closer, his eyes never leaving hers, "You don't hate me, Lana, you hated yourself for loving me."

The breath was knocked out of her body as his words ripped apart the shell which encased her heart.

"No," she whispered hoarsely. "I didn't, I couldn't love you, Lex...I loved Clark."

Lex didn't even flinch at the mention of his mortal enemy's name. Instead a sarcastic smirk twisted his mouth, as he raised a brow in her direction. "That was what you were meant to do, it was what everyone in Smallville expected you to do, but we both know that Clark was never who you wanted and that, my dear, is why you turned yourself against me..."

Lana stared at him, speechless.

Had he known all this time?

"How do you know that?" She asked, all pretences gone.

Lex stepped closer still, his body inches from hers, "I know everything about you, Lana, because I **_know_** you. I know your failures and your triumphs, I know your strengths and your weaknesses - I know you better than I know myself."

"Why..?" She gasped. Why had he waited all these years if he had known her dreadful secret?

"Why did I wait?" He asked, sardonic amusement evident in every line of his face. "Because I needed you to come to me. You had to realise what I've known all along."

Lana swayed on her feet, her breathing fast, her body drawn to his like a magnet. "What have you know all along, Lex?"

He reached out for her then, guided by instinct alone, his large hands wrapping around her upper arms in a steel like hold. Lana shook at the contact, her entire body quivering with need as Lex touched her for the first time in far too long. "That you belong with me."

Lana felt surrender swell in her heart as she inhaled his delicious essence greedily through her nose and mouth, yes, this is what she needed, what she craved.

Lex.

Only him.

He watched her emotions flicker across her face, his whole body tense, waiting for rejection or maybe a miracle.

Lana moved closer to him, her body tingling as they melted into each other.

They didn't speak, she raised her face to his and Lex leaned down to her until their mouths met with a sigh.

It was an explosive kiss, neither one hesitating, each going for the taste of the other.

Too long denied, the passion they had always had exploded, filling them both with undeniable pleasure.

Tongues explored, teeth clashed and lips caressed, as Lana Lang kissed Lex Luthor beside a fountain.

It felt like coming home.

It felt like power.

He pulled her against his body, his hands cradling her face as he ravaged her mouth a deeply as he could. She tasted like the sweetest nectar, the ambrosia of the gods.

They pulled apart briefly, both breathless, "Come home with me, Lana." Lex said, his voice rough with passion.

Lana traced his face with her trembling hands, every touch feeding her body with elation and midblowing sensation.

This is what she had needed, this is what she wanted.

She wanted to die a thousand deaths in his arms, no matter what the outcome was.

"I'm already home, here with you." She whispered against his mouth. "You are my home, Lex, I'm done denying it."

Lex felt triumph engulf him as he held the only woman he'd ever loved as close as she would go.

Lana had finally come home.

He had won.


End file.
